Thursday 22 October 2009

DEVELOPMENT CIRCLE - 20TH OCTOBER

Despite my recent stay in hospital I was determined to make it to this weeks Circle, as I desperately didn't want to miss a second one - it meant being very organised with my meals and ensuring I got plenty of rest through the day and both were achieved.

On arriving there was a new face with L, her DD La, and Aureen made the introductions. L was curious as to why I hadn't been there the previous week so I gave them the run down of what happened and the outcome. More arrivals soon followed: S2 and then A turned up again (she'd been having big problems with babysitters but hoped it was now sorted), then Sh. S1 wouldn't be coming as the problems with her new baby grandson were still ongoing. Aureen then told us about an incident she'd had before coming to the Circle: she had got in from work feeling very cold and had gone for a bath to warm up but when she'd sorted herself and was getting her shoes on she got an excruciating pain in her foot. She thought the change of temperatures had set off her rheumatoid arthritis but she checked her shoe...... and found a flippin' great hornet in it! Her OH sorted the hornet but her foot was left feeling very painful - she hoped it wouldn't affect things tonight but if it started to swell she would have to call a halt to the night. Poor Aureen - she was looking quite pale and drawn, so we all wished her well and told her to make sure she did say if she felt unwell at any point but she said she was sure she'd be OK and we went through into the other room.

Aureen then explained, for La's and A's benefit, about the Healing Book and we were all given the opportunity to add names of those people or animals we felt needed healing and say a prayer for them, sending out healing thoughts along with it. She then proceeded to read a piece about the Heart Chakra (separate post) and another piece on what she was given by her Guides when she asked them what Love Thy Neighbour meant, in response to a question posed by a former Circle's member. It was interesting and made us think about our own responses and feelings. We then proceeded to open the Circle, then protect and ground ourselves and open our Chakras - this was done with Aureen guiding us, due to La being new.

Aureen then proceeded to guide us through expanding our auras and connecting with all Circle members and then on into the Heart Chakra meditation, where we were to connect with the Air element, all living things and the Earth and see what messages we were given. It proved to be a very emotional experience for a few of us but not in the expected way: normally this has proved to be a really uplifting universal meditation but several of us had very personal experiences and found it a little uosetting.

Sh was obviously upset and couldn't talk about what had happened to her but La said I'm sorry but I have to give you a message: there's a chap called E here who is very insistent and tells me I have to give you a big bunch of white roses and she gave a description of him. Sh cried as it had something to do with her own experience: she had been upset anyway, as it was close to a special anniversary, and the meditation had obviously brought it all out. Aureen said that she felt that it might have been better if Sh hadn't come tonight because of that and she agreed..... but it was too late.

S2 said she had felt all bubbly and uplifted on the way there and been looking forward to the meeting but the meditation had resulted in her own personal experience, with her seeing her parents (they'd both passed away in sudden and difficult circumstances). She hadn't liked it and pushed it away, as she felt it was being selfish when it was supposed to be a universal connection. She then felt that she wanted to give me a hug.

I could have done with that hug! I'd also felt really bubbly beforehand. The meditation had started out OK and I felt I was connecting, as I kept getting fleeting images of all kinds of creatures of the Earth and even saw Earth as viewed from space, as if I was floating above it........ then I felt a little sad, then I saw the image of my Mum forming in my minds eye which was pushed away and then I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I got a tissue from my pocket, desperately trying to stem the flow and not disturb the others, all without opening my eyes. Aureen asked if I would be OK and I said I will be - L touched me on the shoulder, as a gesture of support. They gathered that I'd also had a personal experience and I said yes, I'd seen my Mum: she had been the mainstay throughout our childhood, as Dad had always been out at work to bring in the money to keep a roof over our heads and food in our bellies, so she was my main focal point of and for love until I met my DH. I also knew my aura was expanded and heart Chakra was fully open because I was also getting a full on hit from everyone else's emotions too.

L felt she had done OK with the meditation and knew her heart Chakra was open because she said it felt like one of those megaphones and she said that it had almost hurt. She felt she had also connected with her Dad. I can't remember much else.

La had had the message for Sh which she had passed on but it had upset her that it had upset Sh so much. Can't remember what else.

A had a personal connection, seeing her OH, though she did say that he was very much on her mind at the moment, as he was having a rough time.

Aureen herself had seen herself as an eagle, soaring above the Earth and all living creatures on it, dropping little hearts all over everything. What a lovely vision. :0)

Thinking back on all this: I feel my initial meditation was picking up on Aureen's vision, to some extent, and that I'd picked up on S2 pushing the image of her parents away due to the image of my Mum being pushed away..... and it felt like I wasn't just crying for me, as it kind of overwhelmed me a little, in that I had no control over it.

It all went to illustrate what Aureen warned us about again: that sometimes sitting in a Circle will be extremely emotional and we won't be able to control those emotions. She gave us an instance from her own experiences and told us that we shouldn't try and fight it, as she had done that time, as it would just make it worse. If the emotions were impressed on us it was best to let them out. Well we certainly did that night! LOL

When we'd settled down again it was time to turn the light out and open ourselves up but this time we were to invite our Guides to come forward and ask them if they had any messages for us.

Sh saw a cobbled Cornwall seaside street and described it and the gentleman she saw there - A also saw the same thing - and it was for L and connected with her Dad. There was more but I can't remember it.
S2 saw a lady with plaits and dressed in a Russian style costume for La - that's all I remember.
I hadn't seen anything. Aureen asked if I was sure: yes, definitely sure this time. I was feeling decidedly tired and uncomfortable (the pincushion butt bruising was really bothering me), as well as emotionally drained, by this time. I hadn't been able to focus properly and for some reason my eyes kept wanting to open. Afterwards I wondered if this was something to do with the Clairvoyance card I pulled from my Oracle Cards earlier in the day: a way of my Guide telling me that I should be using all of my senses, including my physical ones - and perhaps I should have allowed my eyes to stay open, as I may have been shown something. I don't know but Aureen mentioned needing patience and perseverance, as Spirit does and will test us, and I told the group about re-reading the piece about perseverance just before coming to the Circle and felt it was very relevant: I'd tried meditating previously and had given up when I wasn't getting anywhere with it; I felt that now I had to prove that I wasn't going to give up - she said to myself and I said yes, to myself but more especially to Spirit. So, although I did feel a little disheartened by it - and, let's face it, probably will feel like that at other times too - I will NOT give up....... because I know I've had successes too.
L said she hadn't seen her Guide and said that, for the first time, she'd actually felt a little irritated by it. There she was inviting them in and..... nothing.... come on, then, where are you! I smiled and said: I know all about that. LOL So L felt the patience/perseverance thing was relevant to her too.
La said E, the chap for Sh, was still there but she'd also seen someone else but I can't remember who or anything else.
A had seen two people who she felt were for her: an older woman with white hair and a young man. This led Aureen to tell us a little about Doorkeepers and Guides and that one of those people may be her Doorkeeper and the other her Guide...... we'd be doing more work on both further along. A said she had also seen L's Guide stood behind her and felt he had a real sense of fun because he prodded her occasionally, as if to say "I'm here". L said: well tell him to stop poking me and come and introduce himself then, which had us all laughing.

Aureen then told us what she had seen for each of us. For me it was a white haired woman who was stood behind me but with her hands on my shoulders, giving me healing. I felt it was my Mum, who had always been there for us when we were ill.... and I got a little teary again.

Time, as always, had raced past so we then had to close our Chakras, cloak ourselves and close the Circle. A mentioned she was going to see Colin Fry and TJ Higgs that week which led to a conversation about mediums..... and I mentioned seeing Ian Lawman, the messages he'd brought us from Dad and how good he was. I would love to see both Colin and TJ at some point too. :0) With that we all said our goodbyes, with L hoping that I felt much better the following week and all goes well with the further tests, and left.

DH was waiting and we went home, via a quick call at Tesco Express for a few bits and pieces, so I could rest my poor butt on a softer chair - I was aching and shattered. With hindsight, perhaps, Like Sh, it would have been better if I had stayed away that week, to allow more recuperation time, but I couldn't bear the thought of missing yet another week and having to play catch up even more. The opportunities to meditate in hospital were non-existent (even when I felt much better) and I'd only managed it a couple of times since coming home, as I'd initially been reluctant to open myself up when I'd been on my own and not feeling 100%. Oh well, more practice now and hopefully a much better week next week. :0)

1 comment:

Julie said...

A very emotional evening for you all

I hope Aureens foot heals well, what a nasty thing to happen