Tuesday, 30 March 2010


Another Thursday and time for another acupuncture session. As the appointment was at 12pm I got up a little later than usual and had a late breakfast.... I didn't want to end up getting really hungry part way through the treatment, as it doesn't make for a relaxing session when your stomach keeps making grumbling noises. LOL

When I arrived at the Clinic Jan was on reception again and definitely looking much more happy and relaxed. She asked how I was doing and my reply was: I like my meds... I'm much calmer and more balanced when I'm on my meds & posed, as if I was meditating. She laughed and said does that mean my DH and DS were safe now, so I told her they no longer felt like they were treading on egg shells...... or rushing to hide the knives and heavy based frying pan. ROFL I also reported that the hot flushes were starting to recede again. Janet popped out of Treatment Room 1 and said she would be ready for me soon.... the previous client was just getting himself sorted, then she went into Room 2 to another client. Whilst Jan and I were chatting the chap came out, made his next appointment, paid and left. I got my phone out and showed Jan the pics of my new baby - she liked the car and said that it looked like I would be all set for travelling to the Shamballah Healing Course in May. Yep, though I would get DH to take me out that way beforehand, so I could get the route fixed in my head - it's ages since we've been out towards her village, so it's a struggle to remember which direction it's in at the moment. She told me the quietest route to travel out, ready for the first trial run. :0)

By this time Janet had gone back through to Room 1 and got it ready, then called me in. Whilst I put my bags down and got my coat off she popped out to have a word with Jan, then came back in. After sitting down she looked right at me and said that this week, before we went any further, she needed to have a serious talk with me. Oh heck, that sounded ominous! LOL She said that she had been to the Pagan Conference in Lincoln at the weekend, going to a very interesting talk on Shamanism and generally reconnecting with aspects of her healing, including meditation.... and had since been meditating at home. She had come to realise that, despite usually having a very high success rate treating menopausal symptoms in many clients, she currently had two clients on her books that didn't seem to be responding as well. I was one of them.
She'd meditated on this and had come to realise that it might be because of her: although she had self-treated herself after her own surgically induced menopause onset, and had been successful in most areas, there were two that she still had problems with: hot flushes and dry skin. The two areas that were still troubling myself and the other lady - the main ones I'd been going to her for. She felt it was a case of "Physician, heal thyself" - until she had either found another acupuncturist to treat her (her previous one had had to retire) or was more proactive in self-treatment, she felt, although treatments would continue to help with hormone balance, she wouldn't get any further in treating me for the flushes and dry skin, so it was my decision as to whether I wanted to carry on with the treatments or stop them.

I thanked her for her honesty - there aren't many people who would be so open, when it comes to losing regular business. I said that, although the treatments didn't seem to be helping with the hot flushes and dry skin, I did feel that they had and were helping me in other areas. Janet had also been adapting the treatments to include the Spiritual element and past issues. I asked her if the previous treatments she'd done to help release past issues would bring old memories to the surface and she confirmed that they would. OK, then that's further proof that it's working: I've been recalling all kinds of old memories, some of them from way back in childhhood, that had been upsetting or annoying or some other negative effect on me. I said when this happened it made me think: Whoa, where the heck did that come from? What had really surprised me was the fact that, despite thinking I'd dealt with a lot of these issues, once recalled they still gave me the same reaction... either getting upset or angry or frustrated, whatever.

Janet explained that although I had dealt with some of the issues, she likeened what I had actually done with others to putting them into individual boxes and carrying them around with me deep in my body. Others I had dealt with, but the negative feelings associated with them were still being carried around too. Occasionally they surface or stay internal and impede the energy flow, both of which result in dis-ease.... she felt that this was contributing to my current psychic block. What she said made sense to me on all kinds of levels, so I said I would like to continue with the treatments... as she's been honest with me I said I would trust her judgement on whether this should continue to be weekly, or drop to fortnightly or monthly. She said she would think on that and let me know what she felt at the end of the session.

She said she knew I would understand what she was saying when she explained it how she did.... but she now had to think of a different way of saying the same thing to the other lady. I think that may mean the other lady isn't into the Spiritual side.... though I do wonder if she may be clairsentient and if that had had a part to play in the lack of success in our treatments. 

Janet then said that some of the things that needed to be dealt with was really old stuff. Yep, some of what I was remembering was from waaay back, and I then went on to tell her about a couple of incidents that had come back to me that week. The first was when I was back in Nursery School and surfaces every so often: it's a distinct memory of being in the cloakroom; all of the kids and teachers were gathered around a table that had a big bowl of soapy water on it and they were using all kinds of things to blow bubbles; I was sat on one of the benches, away from everyone, really wanting to join in but wanting to keep well away from everyone too; I was upset about something that had happened.... though I don't know what. My Dad discovered, when I'd left there and my DBro was attending, that the teachers had a nasty habit of locking kids in a cupboard as a punishment and Dad had challenged them about it. He reckoned they'd done that to me too, though I don't recall it and don't have claustrophobia as a result, as some people go on to develop after such an incident. Obviously they wouldn't get away with such antics these days but this was in the 1960's. Needless to say, Mum and Dad refused to let my DSis attend the nursery.

The other incident had occured when I was about 12 years old, when a boy my DBro knew said some insulting things about me that upset me..... and the reaction my Dad gave, when I got back home in tears. I'd told my Mum and Dad about it and said something along the lines of the boy making me feel very ugly. Dad was no good at dealing with emotional situations... and reacted angrily and as if it was my fault... and followed it up by agreeing that I was ugly, with Mum protesting in the background. Mum had put up with a lot of emotional abuse throughout her childhood, from her Mum and DSis's, and knew the hurt it caused. That had hurt more than what the boy had said and made me even more upset (I don't remember the outcome of all this).... and it had obviously cut deep, as it set me off crying a little. Janet placed her hand over mine and said it was OK - I muttered something about being menopausal not helping things at all - and that she would help me to bring these things out and finally deal with them so they can be let go. She felt that the Shamballah Healing Course would also be of much benefit too, as we would be doing things on releasing and cutting cords and the like.

With that she took my Chinese pulses, then I had to take my shoes and socks off, plus took off my specs and hair scrunchie, so I could get comfortable on the pillows. Janet then said that this week she needed me to lay slightly to the left of the bed, so I could lay my right arm down flat. That was necessary because she wanted to put a needle in my right arm and once it was in I had to keep the arm as still as possible, to allow the energy to flow freely and let the needle do its thing. Once positioned she started to place the needles: around four in the top of my head; one in either wrist; one in the side of my left hand; several around my ankles; the nasty little bugger in the top of my right foot (yep, it gave me another belt); one in my third eye and the final one in my right forearm. I asked about that one: the one in the top of my foot is for the liver and helps release issues - the forearm one does a similar thing but on a much deeper level, thus it will allow the deeper issues to come up and be released and clear any energy blockages.

Janet then said that I was to know that I was perfectly safe in the room and that I could let go, knowing that it was perfectly safe to do so. As I was feeling somewhat warm and clammy at this point (partly menopause, partly upset, partly the warm room) she said she would come back and check on me in fove minutes, to make sure I was OK. Music on, the light off... she left me to relax.

Oddly enough I did start to relax. As promised she came back to check on me - good job, as my feet had started to get cold and the rest of me was cooling rapidly. Out came the thermal silver thingy and I was soon warm again so off she went, leaving me for another 20 minutes of treatment. It was good to see those Chakra colours back again, swirling behind my eyes. :0) Despite the previous upset the relaxation mode continued - surprising really as, with what Janet had said about letting go, I'd half expected all kinds of memories to start bubbling up to the surface with all the attendant emotions. Nope, just a lovely drifty feeling that almost had me nodding off again, making that 20 minutes go awfully quick. LOL

Once back in the room and the light back on Janet asked how I felt. Fine, relaxed and definitely feeling brighter than beforehand. LOL The needles were soon out and the sites dabbed. Once she'd made sure I was OK and I was sat up, she reminded me to take some sips of water before sorting myself out and getting ready to leave. I thanked her and she went off to deal with her next client. I did this, as well as wrapping myself in white light as protection, then got myself sorted and headed out to reception.

The next appointment made and bill paid I said my goodbyes and headed for the door....... and straight into the Hospice Bookshop. Julie, I don't know if someone is clearing their shelves or if they are delivered from elsewhere (they do take in boxes of books from somewhere else) but they've obviously cottoned on to the fact that there's a lot more interest in this type of book, as there always seem to be something of interest in there each time I go in. Lookit at what was there this time:

I came out a very happy bunny. LOL From there I headed down the street, first calling in at the Wilko's style shop (can never remember it's name) and coming out with a new chopping board for the kitchen and a couple of other bits, then into Wilko's where I got a meeting notepad. I had gone in looking for storage boxes but neither shop had anything suitable. I opted not to go round the market as my stomach was letting me know it was dinnertime, so headed back up the High Street, via Tesco Express for a couple of bits, and then home. Once the shopping was put away the stomach got fed. LOL

I was quite tired by then and eventually ended up having an early night. I did wonder if the memory recall would really kick off this week....... but hardly anything has returned to bother me. A result? I guess we shall see, once my next 28 day cycle is up. In the meantim, I have had a couple of vivid dreams, coinciding with the recent full moon, that have had clear messages for me concerning the block. Am hoping there's a chance to mention them to Aureen at the next Circle, to get her take on them and see if I've understood them correctly. Funnily enough, the main dream concerned me moving from the back seat to the front seat of a car.... though a left hand drive - another sign that the Universe has a sense of humour. ;0)

Monday, 29 March 2010


I got to Circle early again this week, all thanks to some mouldy bread. It stopped DH from making himself a sandwich, so he decided to have fish and chips instead.... and he was in a hurry to get me there so he could head off to the chip shop straight after. I didn't complain, as it would give me chance to chat to Aureen again before everyone arrived.

I was able to tell her what I'd forgotten on Saturday: that the spoilt Yorkshire Terrier she'd seen and asked about belonged to my maternal grandparents. She was really pleased about that. We chatted a little more before Sh and S1 arrived, when she told us that the lady who owns the house will be back next week. Aureen had been doing some cleaning to ensure that things were straight before she arrives, as she didn't want the lady to think we weren't looking after the place and thus decide not to allow us to use it any more. The lady doesn't mind us continuing to meet whilst she's home though... she's a Spiritualist, so will probably join us whilst there.

Unfortunately S2 couldn't come again this week (her Uncle is seriously ill) and G is still chesty and hasn't regained her voice yet. Whilst we waited a little longer to see if A would turn up I grabbed some old postcards out of my bag to show Sh. She'd brought out a piece of paper to show something to me and we both said "I've got something to show you" at the same time, followed by Sh saying "You show me yours and I'll show you mine" which made us all laugh. I reminded them about Sh mentioning a Bert the previous week and said that whilst my DSis was having a sort through all the old photographs and memorabilia our Mum had kept she'd come across these postcards, with a decidedly Edwardian look to them (though possible repros), and showed her the back of one of them. It had been signed by a chap called Hubert.... possibly the Bert Sh had mentioned. But we don't have a clue who Hubert was or even who the recipient of the card was. It obviously meant something to Mum, as she'd kept the pair of postcards all these years..... and he wasn't the Bert i thought he was either. So that was another hit for Sh and again went to prove that this isn't all down to minreading or remembering something that had once been said. I also told them both about Aureen's hit with the Yorkie.

Sh then showed me her bit of paper whilst reminding me about the castle I'd seen. She'd been on the internet and found the name of it.... and that it was this castle that Disney based their Sleeping Beauty Castle on. S1 asked her if she had any plans to go to Disneyworld in the US.... or could it be Disneyworld Paris? Sh doesn't have any holiday plans at the moment..... or, maybe, she will be doing something as mundane as watching a Disney movie with one of her young family members? Who knows.... so watch this space. LOL

It became evident that A wasn't coming again so we went through into the other room, removing the spare chair from the Circle before taking our seats. We passed the Healing book round so we could add names and then we took it in turns to hold it and send healing to all those named inside. Although I'm never quite sure if I'm doing this "right" it's done with the best of intentions and I always find it a moving process. Aureen then told us that we would be doing a meditation but not to worry if we couldn't do it, as it was rather a difficult one. We were to know that if at any time we weren't happy with anything that happened within the meditation we could take ourselves back into our garden and stay there until we met up again further along in the meditation.

With that we opened the Circle, then protected and grounded ourselves and opened our Chakras. We then had to concentrate on our breathing and relaxation - the breathing involves taking air in through the nose, holding it for the count of four, then breathing out through our mouths. Once relaxed we were to walk along the country lane to the gate into our garden, enter it and wander around for a little while, opening all our senses and noticing what was there. After a while we were to notice a corner we hadn't seen before: it had a brick wall that had three steps leading down to it and on the wall was a mirror. We had to stand before the mirror and look into it, looking at our reflections, then after a while notice what was going on in the background of the mirror.... and see ourselves changing, noticing what we looked like. After a while we were to see ourselves in the mirror again, walk away and back up the steps, back through the garden and out of the gate and back along the country lane.... then come back to ourselves. Aureen then asked each of us what we had seen.

Sh had had a lovely experience: she had found it a little difficult to find a wall she hadn't noticed before because hers is a walled garden anyway... but she managed to do it. I think she said her mirror was a gold arch and when she looked into it she saw herself all the time.... but the background seemed to be misty, then it cleared and she could see all her loved ones who have passed over. They were so happy that she could see them all at last, as they'd been waiting for a while for this to happen. She was so pleased, saying that she regularly talked to several of them but hadn't been able to see them.... until now. Aureen said she had connected well but in a surprising way to what had been expected, as the meditation was to try and connect with a past life.

Me next. Before we'd begun the meditation I'd felt someone standing behind my left shoulder, and had even glanced over it to see if I could see anything (I hadn't) and had also felt a warmth there, rather than the usual cold spot sensation. I'd even struggled to visualise the bits of my garden I normally manage to see, though had had a really vivid image of sweet peas - not had these in my garden before but I do associate these with my maternal Grandad, as he used to grow them, so wondered if the presence I'd felt stood behind me was him. I'd managed to see the mirror: a fancy gold scollwork frame thing, very much in the Snow White type tradition, though hadn't really been able to see myself in it, let alone anything else. I had been very aware of the cobweb feeling on my face, had felt my hair being touched and my right ear being tickled - so Spirit was definitely around. Aureen mentioned that she had felt a touch on her leg.... and also said not to worry about the meditation, as it is a difficult one to do. Not sure I want to practice this one at home yet: there are enough issues to work through in this life to keep me occupied for a while, without discovering any from a past one. The thought of finding out I used to be a Nazi guard or something equally terrible really is something that, so far, has stopped me from undertaking regression.... and probably contributed to it not working. LOL

Aureen had seen herself quite clearly in a former life.... she was a Viking woman and was stood at the edge of the water, watching as the boat with her loved one's body burnt, before an old woman put an arm around her and drew her away. She recognises that it may be because of this that she was drawn to live in this area, only finding out afterwards that all the village and town names ending in -by meant former Viking occupation.... and wondered if she had lived here in an earlier life. Her ex-husband and current OH both have a Viking look to them - something she hadn't realised until it was pointed out to her by friends. Obviously that lifetime has had a strong influence on some things in this.

We then went on to do some clairvoyance, with Aureen saying to just go to the person we felt most drawn to and try to get one good message, rather than worrying about going to everybody (I know this is mostly for my benefit). She asked if we'd prefer to do this with the light on or off and we all preferred the light off..... for some reason we all felt that it helps. After a while she brought us back to ourselves and turned the light on, then asked each of us in turn what we'd received.

Sh had seen a tiny elderly woman with white hair stood in the centre of the Circle and felt that she was for me - her name was Molly. She'd also seen a man stood between S1 and me and wasn't sure who he was for, though she felt his name was Timothy. Molly didn't ring a bell but, as she was in older style clothing, she could be from the Great's time.... and I don't know much about them. Neither of us could think of a link to Timothy, so Aureen just thanked him for coming. She saw S1 preparing for the party again, with the sherry and Sainsbury's party food shopping.... though S1 still doesn't have or know of any plans for this.

Aureen then asked me if I'd got anything. Not a lot. After the light went off and I'd shut my eyes I was aware of a really bright light on the right side of my inner vision. There is always a brighter spot behind S1, from the kitchen window, but it definitely wasn't that - I've had this before but not as vivid as it became this time: it seemed to build and become more intense, sort of bright light with possibly a little pink, and all the while I kept expecting someone/thing to walk out of it.... or for something to happen. But it just seemed to get so far, then fizzled out and rapidly faded away. I made a joke of just being glad that they didn't want me to go into it, which made them laugh. I turned to Sh and said that I felt Fuschia Man was there again (felt I'd seen some standard fuschia bushes, though they weren't overly clear, so didn't mention them) and apologised for calling him that and hoped he wasn't offended.... but I didn't know what else to call him, yet. She said he would probably laugh.... and that the ear tickling could be him, as he was a bit of a joker.

S1 said what she had seen was for her and was continuing with the fairytale theme that seemed to be popping into things tonight (Sleeping Beauty's castle/Snow White mirror/her witchy self). She'd seen herself as Rapunzel, locked in the tower, but had climbed out herself. There was a little more which I can't remember. Aureen gave her a few insights into what it could mean (personal) and suggested she thought about it and meditated on it at home. The witch thing still seemed to be bothering her a little, so probably had an affect on what she picked up.

Aureen told Sh and S1 what she'd seen for them - one was personal and the other I can't remember. For me (and I always remember these, as I write them down in my book for future reference) she asked who had the link with Churchill, as she'd just got the name. I laughed and said that that would be my DH - not only is he mad on anything to do with Lancaster Bombers, he's also the same about Churchill and has watched programmes about him lots of time, as well as having loads of books about him. She said then the cuckoo clock I saw is for him and asked whose it was. I didn't know - if she'd said Grandfather Clock then I could have said.... but she said no, it was definitely a cuckoo clock as she'd heard the cuckoo noise. So it was one to ask DH later. She then asked if an Easter Bonnet meant anything to me and felt that it was something to do with a school memory. Another laugh: the junior achool I attended used to have bonnet parades at Easter and Christmas, where we all had to make one (supposedly by ourselves, without help - yeah, right! LOL). I'd won a prize one year with a hat made by my maternal Grandma and said that it was one of the few good memories I'd got of the woman. Next she asked who Doris or Dorothy was: Aunty Doris was one of my favourite Aunty's (or, rather Great Aunt). She was married to my Grandma's DBro, both lovely people who didn't have children of their own so always made a fuss of the youngsters within the family. Funnily enough, as I pointed out, DSis and I had been looking at their photos on the Sunday.
My Aunty Dorothy is on this side of life but I forgot to mention that. Aureen then asked who Edward was. Wow, she was red hot! Little Eddie - or Cheeky Charlie as we called him - was my cousin and he'd been knocked down and killed when he was just 8 years old: he was all excited about going on his first Cub camp and had taken his things over to the church hall but had forgotten his permission slip; before anyone could stop him he'd run back towards his home to go and fetch it, across the road and straight into the path of a van. The poor little mite had been killed instantly. His Dad, my Uncle T, was in Hong Kong at the time, waiting to board his ship (he was Chief Engineer of a Merchant Navy vessel) - at the exact moment Eddie died Uncle T heard him shout Daddy. Oddly enough, his Dad has currently got a health issue to do with his diabetes and needs to go for some tests. Aureen said that he'd grown some since then, over in Spirit, so I must have been young at the time.... I was about 19 years old when it happened. I still think about him at times. She said that all the touching and tickling was down to him, playing games, something Spirit children love to do. :0)

S1 had done OK with the garden but had had to hastily improvise with the wall and steps. Her mirror had been a plain one (wood I think) but had made her think of Snow White and the Mirror, Mirror on the wall bit.... and she wasn't sure if that had had something to do with what she saw..... because her face morphed and she could see herself as a witch. It was something she hadn't been overly keen on seeing and wasn't too sure about.... because, as she reached the gate to leave her garden she glanced back and said: And don't follow me! before leaving. She had said it so forcefully that she had almost said it out loud. Aureen asked her if she felt she had seen herself in a former life..... S1 wasn't sure. I looked at her and said what does your gut reaction tell you - and she replied that, yes, she thought it had been herself in a former life... she'd been a witch. She didn't seem at all comfortable with the thought....... I guess that centuries of bad press from the church have coloured that for her. If you go by her obvious psychic skills then a former life as a witch... or wise woman... is almost a given. It made me wonder if that's perhaps why I've always felt like I've seen her some place before. :0)

With this it was time to close down ourselves and the Circle, which we did. Once done we helped Aureen replace the table and chairs into the area we use, turning it back into the dining room it's supposed to be, then put all the glasses away (we always have glasses of water to hand, as it's thirsty work) and made sure everything was tidy. We then headed for the door. As I was leaving I asked Aureen if there was anything I could do to try and improve things: practice was the answer, just keep practising all the techniques. I do.... but it doesn't help that nine times out of ten I keep falling asleep just recently - I could really do with something to stop that from happening. LOL With that we all said our goodbyes and headed home.

DH was waiting outside, quite happy now he'd had his fish and chips and stunk out the car with them. I asked him if he had had a relative with a cuckoo clock - he reckoned he had but couldn't place who it was. I suggested he ask his Dad, next time he rang him for a natter. We decided to have a trip to the main Tesco to do some shopping this week, so I could stock up on some of my special foods and get a few other bits we needed. The cupboards were nicely stocked afterwards but it made it a long night so we were well and truly shattered after we'd got home and put it all away. We were glad to go to bed..... and both slept well.

Monday, 22 March 2010


Saturday started out a little hectic as I'd asked DH if we could go to the Harlequin Office Furniture place in the morning, to see if they had anything suitable for storage in my Craft Room, as they were only open until 12pm. As usual, when we need to be somewhere in a hurry DH continued to operate on a totally different time zone to everyone else. LOL We made it there about 20 minutes before they were about to close. A young chap came to find out what we were looking for and what it was for: some kind of storage unit and a filing cabinet to go in my Craft Room. He showed us various cabinet type units with doors on but they weren't right. He showed us the filing cabinets and explained a bit about each. The budget version looked OK but the drawers were shorter than the cabinet..... what's the point in that? As I pointed out, the room is small and I need to maximise the storage space to make sure I can get everything in there that needs to go in. He showed us a different one, a nice silver colour with 4 full depth drawers - that was definitely the one.... of course it was a bit more expensive than the other one, wasn't it! He then showed us some sturdy bookcases that have adjustable shelves - they stock extra shelves, so I can get more when I decide how many I need. DH wrote down all the measuremenets and other details so we could have a measure up at home and work out where they'll go. The same place can also supply some rubber rollers for my computer chair, which are much quieter and better for rolling on laminate flooring.... much cheaper than buying a new chair and they'll fit them for us if we take the old chair in. The upshot: the items I want are all carried in stock so, once ordered and paid for, they can arrange a delivery slot and they will even put it all up and place it where it's wanted. How good is that? We came away from there quite happy with what we'd seen and found out. :0)

From there we had to go straight home so I could get some dinner and then get ready to go for my Reiki session. Of course the weather was a tad wet when it was time for me to walk down the street - good job I bought a new kagoul last year. LOL

When I arrived at the Clinic it was to find Jan was being the Receptionist. I asked how she was doing - she certainly looked better and seemed far less fraught than last time... and sounded it, too. The move is suiting her very much and she's settling in nicely to her new home. She asked how I'd been doing so I told her that the last few days hadn't been so great: I'd run out of the herbal mix a while ago and had decided to see how I went without it, relying on the acupuncture, rejigging my diet a little and some supplements that included red clover leaf extract capsules I'd bought from Julian Graves some time ago. My 28 day cycle had been on the Thursday: I'd felt great after acupuncture but by the evening I'd felt a tad fraught.... and had felt really fraught Friday and into Saturday. She asked what I meant by fraught: well, don't leave any sharp implements near me... or blunt ones, for that matter - DS had been giving me some attitude Friday night and I told him he had better just shut his mouth or I'd be over to sort him out. If it hadn't been for having my tray on my lap at the time I would probably have been over there and done a laying on of hands.... and it wouldn't have had anything to do with healing. LOL The feisty moods had been interspersed with really low sessions, not helped by the flushes and night sweats being a real bugger. I told her that what I'd been doing just wasn't enough, that I'd felt much more balanced whilst on the herbal med, with the flushes and sweats being barely noticeable...... obviously it was something in the combination of ingredients within the mix that worked for me. It was worth the little experiment, to find out, but I'd had enough - I wanted that balance back. LOL Jan was quite pleased with that and said that she'd love to have some feedback from me, when I am in again next Thursday, on how I am feeling then because, if I have settled down again, it means she might just have found a really good combination that could help some of the other women she's treating for menopausal symptoms. I said I'd let her know. She didn't have time to mix the med then as I was due to go into Treatment Room 1 (where her dispensary is) for Reiki and she had someone booked in for a colonic and they should be arriving shortly. She asked if I could go back at 3.30pm when she would have finished and I said that was fine. As she was going to be busy when I came out the next appointment was arranged and I paid for this session.

Aureen was now ready for me, so off I trotted. Aureen then asked how I'd been doing so I gave her a potted version of what I'd told Jan. I also told her about the postponed pick up of my new car, thanks to DH not getting the insurance sorted in time, and how disappointed I'd been about that and feeling generally fed-up. She said there was obviously a reason the pick up not happening yet. Yep, I know, which is why I didn't get really upset about it, but if it had just been the one thing I'd probably have been fine.... but there have been quite a few niggling things that have all come at once..... and I'm so obviously menopausal at the moment. I didn't need to say more: she knew exactly what was meant, as she's been through it already and hadn't had a good time with it. So, as there was lots of tension and I was feeling out of balance she decided to concentrate on relaxation and easing of the tension during this session. I took off all my jewellery, hair scrunchie, shoes and specs and got onto the bed so the treatment could begin.

If I've learnt anything from these Reiki sessions it's that you can never guess how it will develop or what will happen, as no two are ever the same. It took me a little longer to settle into the session this time, mostly due to the inward tension but also because there was quite a bit of noise outside, on the High Street, but thankfully the worst of that soon faded into the background. This time I wasn't really aware of many of the Chakra colours swirling behind my eyes but what I did really notice was the energy from Aureen's hands every time she placed them up near my head: it was much more noticeable than usual and was sort of a cross between a buzz and a tingle, just on the edge of hearing.

At the end of the session she said my name and asked how I felt and had I picked anything up? Chamomile, I said. Towards the end of the session that word came to me and it was so forceful I almost said it out loud. She asked what I thought it meant. Well, I've been feeling fraught and I've got some Chamomile herbal tea at home but hadn't been drinking much of it lately - Doh! Aureen said it seemed like my body was letting me know what it needed - yep, and I shall certainly start drinking it more often.
She asked if I'd been aware of any colours this time, as she'd been really aware of blues and purples, almost sparking from her hands. No, not really, and even though I usually see the Chakra colours quite vividly I hadn't really been aware of those this time either, it seemed more of a sensing/feeling session. I told her about feeling the energy buzz/tingle from her hands very strongly and that I'd also felt slight hot and cold sensations around my body but not like obvious changes in exterior temperature, more subtle and, again, more like energy shifts through my body that felt like something was being gently pulled through it. I'd felt this the most when she worked on my Crown Chakra and compared it to opening my Chakras but in reverse. My feet tingled for a while after the final grounding too.
I'd initially seen Angel images. When I see these in my minds eye they are usually quite basic in shape: a head and neck with a long, thin "gowned" body and swept back wings, usually they are all fractal light (sometimes bright light, sometimes like a stained glass window) - this time I just saw the head and wings shapes in silhouette, enough to make me aware of them and then they were gone. I also saw the head of an old lady who had white curly hair but I didn't see her for long enough to make out more of her facial features - I could only tell Aureen that she wasn't my Mum..... and I didn't know who she was. I got the name George again, which is definitely linked to her, and I saw a man's face: dark hair and a dark moustache... again too fleeting to get much more detail, so I didn't mention him.
Aureen told me that she'd found that both my sacral and solar plexus Chakras had been quite flat when she started working on them but had sorted them out and I told her that could explain why I'd recently been having difficulty visualising the orange of the sacral Chakra - the yellow of the Solar plexus had been a tad insipid too.
From about half way through the session there were times when I just didn't know where Aureen was. Sometimes it was due to my feeling another pair of hands working on me in a different area.... sometimes I couldn't feel her hands at all and I couldn't sense where she was, almost as if I'd been left on my own - that was the weirdest sensation ever. Aureen then told me that part way through the session she had opened her eyes and looked at her hands.... and saw a tiny pair of female hands laid over hers - I said Deidra? But she said no, they were definitely adult hands, just very small and pointed to her middle knuckle area - very small hands, then. Maybe they belonged to the white haired lady whose face I saw? 

I sat up and made my way to the chair by the consulting desk so I could start putting my things back on and take some sips of water and where Aureen kept her file (she keeps notes in there - not sure what specifically, though feel it may be similar to the notebook that her Guides told me to keep). Jan tapped at the door and asked if it was OK to come in - her colonic guy hadn't turned up (which she suspected might happen), so she could come and make up my herbal med mix now, rather than having to go back later.

Aureen asked if, when having a Reiki session, I felt I was letting go of things. I can't say as I'd been aware of letting go of anything more than the tension this time.... and compared it to the times when she'd performed psychic surgery - now those times I definitely felt and knew something had gone. I felt this session was more about sorting out the tension and getting me back on an even keel, and I certainly felt much more relaxed than when I'd first walked in.... and we spoke about the chamomile thing coming to me again and how that will help keep me calm. Jan piped up from her dispensing area and said: funnily enough, I'm just adding that to your mix now. LOL

I then asked Jan how the change was suiting her and if she felt a difference in atmosphere between her home and the town. Most definitely and she said said how difficult she'd found it to adjust the first time she'd come back to the Clinic after having some time off during the move and needing to protect herself more thoroughly when coming into the town. I can appreciate that: whenever we've been away on holiday, especially when it's been to the Lake District, it always takes me a while to settle back into my home - I always feel quite jangled, iykwim. We had a bit more chit chat, then Aureen was ready to leave, so I thanked her and said goodbye and see her on Tuesday. As she got to the bottom of the stairs and opened the door we both heard her say Oh! in an odd way and were just about to shout and ask if she was OK when we heard the door close behind her. Once I'd finished the conversation, paid Jan for my med and said goodbye and went to the door I found out why.... it was raining but it was just the tail end of what had been an absolute deluge. There were actual streams running down the gutters and paddling pools worth of puddles all over the place. Yuk!

I decided not to venture further down the street, especially as I was feeling quite tired, so just popped over to Tesco Express (jumping over the gutter streams and dodging the paddling pool puddles) to get a couple of things we needed, then headed home. DH had disappeared off to the Museum while I'd been gone - they are currently running an exhibition on the LTC, as they've just celebrated their 60th Birthday, and DS and a few of the other members had been helping out with the visitor event they were putting on that day. DS and the other members were all in costume from various performances they'd put on. I wouldn't have minded going to see it but the timings were all wrong for that.

After I'd put the shopping away and sat and did a crossword I realised just how tired I felt and started heading upstairs.... just as DH came throught the front door. A quick chat later and I carried on up the stairs, as I was really struggling to concentrate by this time - DH commented on that and said that I actually looked tired too - and went to bed for a couple of hours. It helped and I felt much better after that. I will have to ask Aureen just what she did, when I see her again. Not only because of the tiredness I'd felt.... but also because I've been feeling much brighter since. :0)


I had an 11.30am appointment this week, so I was up and sorted and out of the door by around 11.20, so I could have a steady walk down to the Clinic. It was a reasonable day, too, so it was quite pleasant out... though busy with traffic and people, with it being Market Day.

When I got there this week it was to find Anne in Reception again as G was still poorly and voiceless, Bless her. I had a quick chat with Anne until Janet came through to take me into Treatment Room 2: I needed to rewrite the cheque for the Shamballah Healing Course, as it should have been made out to the chaps business name and not his actual name (quickly sorted). She popped the cheque in the drawer for Jan to collect next time she was in.

Once settled Janet asked how things had been going this week. Not too great, actually: the hot flushes and especially the night flushes were being a bit of a bugger the last few days and I was having a few mood swings/dips.... and explained that my 28 day cycle was up that day, so that might have something to do with it. I said I didn't understand the mood dip otherwise, as I had had a brilliant weekend - she asked what I'd been doing and I told her about putting a deposit on the car and going to the M,B&S event and what Leonie had said about me being a natural and the lift that had given me. I told her I was going to be picking up the car Friday night and was looking forward to that, though a little nervous as it would bring a big change with it -  a necessary one, but I can't help but feel nervous about it.

She asked me how Circle went that week One word answer: cr*p. I felt that quite a bit of what I got was a rehashing of things that had come up before. She said that I seemed to be doing OK, mentioning the song from her Grandma and the Deidra things - yes, it seems I'm getting a bit more outside of Circle but I was bothered by the fact that I couldn't seem to give more back to the other girls. She took a few notes as I spoke and then asked: if I had to use one word to describe how I currently felt, what would it be? I thought a little and she said not to think about it, just say the first thing that came into my head. OK, that would be fed-up, then. Yes, I know - not strictly one word.... but it did sum up how I was feeling...... and it was more polite than the one I used earlier. LOL

Whislt Janet took my Chinese pulses I mentioned that we were also going to be visiting to my DSis's on the following Sunday and I was feeling slightly anxious about that and that I felt it was due to my DSis having a lot of bottled up anger, thanks to what had happened at work and the way Human Resources had handled it and how badly they were now dealing with her request for a letter of exoneration to be added to her work record, and I was really picking up on it. She noted my pulse results and said there was definitely some tension in there, though the pulse wasn't nearly as rapid as it had been previously. Whilst I was taking off my shoes and socks, hair scrunchie and specs and prepared to lay on the bed she asked if I had a strong bond with my DSis, then went to close the blind. Yes, despite the fact that when we were kids the three of us often used to try and half kill one another, we are very close. I told her about the morning I was taken into hospital with the severe abdominal pain: all the while I was in pain my DSis kept getting real bad twinges of pain in her stomach that almost had her keeling over (it got her and the staff really worried) then, just as suddenly as her pains had come they went.... right around the time that the morphine jabs had finally kicked in to ease the pain for me. She didn't get the pain again and realised why she had got it when my DH rang her up that night to tell her what had been happening (she has since told me that she's really glad I can't have any more babies..... she really didn't fancy going through labour with me ROFLMAO). Janet's reaction was: Wow, you really have got a link there. I told her my DSis really should be doing Development too, as she actually sees Spirits regularly - she doesn't want to though, as she doesn't want to have any more happening than what does already... it freaks her out, with her being on her own, so she tries to blank it.

Once on the bed she said she would mostly concentrate on the hormonal side and easing the tension. This time she applied needles to: all round my ankles; the ones for my liver, in the tops of my feet (stung again); the ones on either wrist (heart meridian); in the thumb crease and one in my head, about an inch and a half to two inches above my hair line. When I queried the lack of a third eye needle she said she wouldn't put one in there this time, as she felt this may now be over-stimulating my third eye, possible causing some of the Circle problems. She then warned me she was going to adjust a couple of the needles and to say when they "bit". it was the two in the tops of my feet again and they definitely bit. LOL I asked if I could have the silver foil thingy over me this week, in case I got as cold as last time....... she said she could do better than that this time and pulled out a lovely, thick cotton blanket. As I hadn't got any needles in my legs or torso it was possible to have the blanket on my body and legs and have the towel draped over my toes to keep them warm. Perfect! LOL With that she popped on the music, made sure I was settled, switched off the light and left me to relax.

Well, relax was definitely the operative word this week - the tension just seemed to drain away and I got so relaxed I almost fell asleep. In fact, if it hadn't been for someone somewhere in the building dropping something that made a loud clatter which startled me big time (really not good for my heart, that LOL) I reckon I would have nodded off. I don't remember any real revelations this week, just an image of a china cup and saucer for some reason.

It didn't seem two minutes before Janet came back into the room and asked how I felt. I had to give myself a big stretch and consciously engage brain before talking - and told her it was the most relaxing session yet and felt better. I mentioned the china cup and saucer and asked if it could be linked to her Grandmother. Janet said that she used to like to drink out of a proper cup and saucer but no, this was a proper fine china cup and saucer I'd seen. She said her Mum had to have different drinks out of certain types of cups.... then she mentioned that, actually, she had a really pretty china teacup and saucer, decorated with flowers, that was on display in her home. Another one of those random things that come to me... a small hit. :0) Whilst we were talking Janet removed the needles.... and this time there wasn't a problem removing the ones from the tops of my feet, though I defintitely felt a slight "popping" sensation when they came out.

After seeing I was OK and ready to sit up and get myself sorted and checking if I wanted another session the following week, Janet said goodbye and went off to let Anne know and get the other room ready for her next client. I had a few sips of water and put my things back on, then went out to reception. I made my next appointment and paid for the session, then Anne told me that the lady who had been due in for a Reiki session before me on Saturday had rung to cancel - would an earlier appointment be of use to me? I realised I was the last booking of the day, so asked if that meant that Aureen could go home sooner if I did - it did, so I said OK. It didn't make a huge difference to my plans but it would give Aureen chance to do more afterwards. With that I said my goodbyes and headed for the door.

First stop, as usual, was the Hospice Bookshop and this was my find this time:

Past Life Regression is something I am really curious about and have been considering doing at some point.... providing I can find someone I can trust enough to do it. Am hoping the book can answer some of the questions I have about the process.

From there I headed on down to the market. Unfortunately the Craft Stall lady didn't have any more boxes in yet, it would be another couple of weeks before they arrive - time for patience then. I had a quick scoot around the rest of the stalls and got myself a punnet of bargain strawberries at just £1.00. Hunger had started to kick in by now so I started heading back up the High Street, first calling in at the Greengrocers for some diabetic biscuits... and discovered that they now stock some small Nak'd bars, so added a few of those to my basket too. After paying I headed to Tesco Express for a couple more items, then carried on home. Once there I put my buys away, got changed and made myself some lunch.

I thought I was going to have a quiet day after that. Wrong! A knock at the door revealed a chap, friend to Corus Pete next door, enquiring about DS's old Mini - apparently Pete had mentioned it was for sale and his DS had decided he'd like one after seeing the one he'd bought for his DD. I gave him my DS's mobile number as I didn't know any details about what it had failed its MOT on or how much he was asking for it. He promised to phone DS - though I did warn him he may not answer it, with being at work, and if he didn't he would phone him back later. You could have knocked me down with a feather when a second chap knocked within the hour, also enquiring if the Mini was for sale. He gave me his mobile number so DS could phone him later. A third knock around half an hour later had me wondering what was going on.... though this time it was the postie with some packages. If it had been a third enquiry it would have seriously freaked me out. Why? Because only a few days beforehand I'd been thinking that we could really do with selling the Mini, to get it out of the way and make more room, ready for my new baby arriving.... and I'd casually thought (nope, hadn't even said it aloud) that it would be nice if this could happen soon...... and along come these two chaps. :0)

Unfortunately the first chap was only willing to offer silly money and the second chap dropped out after initially saying he would have it (though that wasn't a surprise, to be honest). But along came a phone call from one of DS's work colleagues on Friday (DS had booked the day off) to ask if he could come and view the Mini.... and he offered a more reasonable sum. DS is now thinking about it.... fingers crossed he decides to take the offer, as I don't think he'll get a better one at this point. Meantime I've thanked the Universe for the help. :0)

Saturday, 20 March 2010


Everything went well this week: a calm, chill-out day; meal cooked and eaten early enough; DH back early enough to eat and be ready on time and setting off with plenty of time to take a nice, steady journey. :0)

I was the first to arrive. Aureen apologised for the coldness of the house, as she'd been a little later than usual setting off, so the heating hadn't been turned up long - she decided to leave the thermostat up a little higher in future, to try and ensure the house doesn't get quite so freezing in future. I said it was OK... I had my thermals on anyway. LOL

As we waited for the others to arrive we chatted and I told her about thinking that Deidra and the young girl that keeps cropping up (even Leonie, my reader, says every time that there's a young girl with me) is for me and explained what had happened since the previous week. We didn't have time to discuss it further as S1 and Sh arrived. When they had sat down she told us that S2 and G couldn't make it this week, as S2 had been at the hospital with a sick relative all night and didn't feel up to coming and poor G was down with a chest infection and had lost her voice. It meant we wouldn't be able to do the Power Animal meditation - disappointing but these things happen.... and there's usually a reason why (such as it not being the right time for one or more of us to do this just yet). We waited a little longer but A didn't turn up either, so we guessed she must have babysitter problems again, as she hadn't texted Aureen to say she wouldn't be coming.

We went through into the other room, taking a chair out of the Circle. Once settled Aureen started to talk to us about Spirit Guides: that we usually have one main Guide, who is with us throughout our lifetime.... and sometimes stays with us through several lifetimes. This Guide may even have been incarnated with us on Earth during a previous lifetime but was more Spiritually developed, so had progressed, but had chosen to come back to help us to progress. Then there were also temporary Guides, who would come to help us over a shorter time and usually for a specific reason or to help us with a particular life lesson. She then told Sh and S1 what I'd said about the young girl and the name Deidra.... and said that she felt Deidra was probably another of my Guides, of the temporary variety, and that perhaps more would be revealed as we eventually undertook the meditation to meet our Spirit Guide...... or it may not become clear yet, as more development would need to be done. Basically, only time will tell.

Aureen then asked us all if we felt that we were learning and developing, which we did, then asked how we felt we were developing/what we were getting out of the Circle. Of course she went and asked me first. Gulp! I said that it was a hard question, as some of it was difficult to put into words, as I felt the differences within. It has helped to open my mind to far more than I expected. I always felt as if I'd missed my way somewhere along the line, not quite fitting in, not knowing what I was supposed to do - just going along with whatever happened (kind of a reactive way rather than proactive, iykwim).... then things happened that led me to this Circle. I likened it to the first time I went to a Mind, Body and Spirit event: when I walked into the hall it was like going home; the atmosphere was lovely - it felt right. And that's how I feel about Circle: it feels right. It's brought focus into my life and I feel that I finally know what I should be doing. (It's also how I felt when I finally realised my true Pagan self - though refrained from saying this). I'm also learning - or trying to learn - some of that much needed patience!
I've thought since then: it's almost as if part of me has been waiting. I've been putting in time, learning various lessons through the years, living and enjoying my life along with my loved ones, growing some....... but still, essentially, waiting. Until now. :0)

Sh and S1 both said that this (Spiritual side) was something they had tended to dip into and out of at various points in their lives.... but that something always seemed to occur that always drew them back to it. Sh told the story of how suddenly becoming aware of a card in a shop window advertising card readings resulated in her booking one, continually forgetting to ask who the reader was, turning up for the session.... to be amazed by meeting up with Aureen again, and that led her to this Circle. S1 had been feeling isolated, somewhat bereft, since her move here... then had decided to go to the Clinic for some herbal medicine to help her stomach problems...... and her talks with Jan had led to an introduction to Aureen and a meeting with me at the Holistic fair... and to the Circle. The Universe seems to have really taken a hand in all of this. :0)

We passed the Healing Book round so we could add names and sent prayers and healing to all named within it. Aureen then said that, as we couldn't do the meditation, we would take the opportunity to do some one-to-one Clairvoyance again as it would be good practice for us. I couldn't help it - my heart dropped into my boots. Cr*p! Despite all my positive thinking and wanting to take things as they came I still reacted negatively..... and that just isn't the way to start one of these sessions. How to block yourself in one easy lesson! LOL So the Circle was opened, protection put in place, grounding done and Chakras opened.

First of all we all concentrated on Aureen. I got a clicking in my right ear initially, then the words Fairy Arch and saw an arch of flowers (very pretty) but no idea as to what it meant. Got the name George again and also saw a pond with lily pads in it. There was also a bunch of flowers. All very random. George keeps coming up for Aureen but I wasn't sure if he came up again because we'd been talking about him earlier. Aureen's left ear had been bothering her.... and as she was sat opposite me it was opposite my right ear. Other than that she couldn't place the other things.

Next we concentrated on Sh. I got Fuschia Man again and had a clicking noise in my left ear and felt a tickling on the left side of my neck (the side Sh was sat) and wanted to laugh. I also felt a quick pain in my left brow. Then I saw what initially looked like a sandcastle but turned into a proper castle - I described it as a well known and much photographed one, standing on a mountainside and surrounded by mountains and somewhere like Bavaria or Germany or the like, as I couldn't then remember more than that it began with an N. (I've since discovered it's called Neucshwanstein Castle and is in Bavaria, as I initially thought).
S1 saw Sh getting dressed up in a proper ballgown and going to a party.... she'd also seen Edinburgh Castle and something or other Mile in Edinburgh.
Aureen mentioned a name and described several things she'd seen and Sh owned them all - unfortunately I can't for the life of me remember what they were now, as the menopausal brain syndrome is really bad at the moment.

Then it was my turn. Sh saw an old man pushing an old handcart down a dirt track and said it looked like a farming type area and felt he was from way back. She got the name Ben/Benjamin and she saw him sat at a kitchen table, eating a solitary meal - she said it was all rather sad and lonely. I couldn't place him but said I'd ask the Uncles if they could - though I do know that there are some sort of farming links on both sides of the family a couple of generations back. She also saw me sipping a glass of sherry or port at some kind of celebration, like an anniversary, though she felt it was someone else's, not mine. She got the name Anita linked with this but the name doesn't bring anyone to mind at the moment.... I wondered if it might be someone to do with the LTC but, again, I don't recall DH or DS having mentioned anyone with that name. Guess I'll have to wait and see. She also said she had got the name Bert too. The only Bert I could think of were neighbours of my Nana and Grandad (Mum's Mum), who used to live across the road, in the corner house, though I didn't know much about them as I was a child at the time.
Aureen said her Guides had told her to tell me to make sure I write everything down, whether it be from within Circle, my dreams or meditations or when I have acupuncture or Reiki. As I seemed to be getting more outside of Circle than in it at the moment I had to especially write those things down. She was told that in the future I would need to be able to go back and check specific details, as it would be important for me. I had already started to do this on a small scale... when I remembered to do so, so Aureen stressed again that I needed to write it all down and make sure that it was all dated too. (I've since started doing this).
She then asked who had had a very spoilt and pampered Yorkshire Terrier. I knew my Nana and Grandad had had a dog when my Mum was a child but thought that had been a Scottie dog/West Highland Terrier (nasty little bugger it was too, from all accounts, prone to biting), then recalled visiting a particular relatives house (Mum's Aunt and Uncle, so my Great's) when I was a small child. They bred dogs and I recall being taken out into some little wooden sheds in their back garden to see some newborn puppies that were under a heat lamp - tiny little things they were, and I wondered if the Yorkie was linked with those. Since then I've chatted to my DSis and it turns out that my Nan and Grandad actually owned an extremely spoilt Yorkie called Mitzi - I'd forgotten all about that! So I'll have to try and remember to tell Aureen at the next Circle.
S1 said she initially saw me in a maze (I smiled because it made me think of walking the labyrinth) but she said I seemed quite panicky, and said it made her think of my agoraphobia and panic attacks, but she said I then stopped panicking and became very calm. Then she heard a voice say: it's OK, Jack will help. I smiled and told them that my Grandad (Dad's Dad) was called Jack - his proper name was John James but everyone called him Jack. I feel this is symbolic: me, currently floundering around and not knowing the way out - though I don't know where my Grandad in Spirit will come in to this - we weren't particularly close in life..... though he was psychic and it did save his life when he was a young man. I'm sure there was something else she got too but I can't remember what it was.

Then we concentrated on S1. First I saw Sydney Opera House, then this was followed by images of an ostrich, a giraffe and a gazelle or antelope - it made me want to ask if she was thinking of or going on safari. Finally I saw a ballet dancer. She has been to Australia and has seen the Opera House and her OH's company has a branch out there and he travels there regularly.... and she would like to go again, so there's a chance of seeing the Opera House again. They have friends living in South Africa and have an open invitation to go and stay.... no plans to, but who knows what the future might hold? She has also been to the ballet and would like to go again some time. I really wasn't sure how much of this I was picking up from Spirit or how much was coming to me from things that had been mentioned previously. I also felt that there was someone stood near her but forgot to mention that at the time.
Aureen had seen a man in a First World War uniform stood near her (so wish I'd remembered and said it!) and I think she said she got the name Stanley linked with him (weird because my Grandad - Mum's Dad - was called that). I can't remember what else came up.
Sh had the name Joan (weird again - same name as my Mum's DSis). The party theme continued, as Sh had seen her attending a party, though more like a party that S1 would be hosting, and that she would enjoy it. She'd also seen her shopping in Sainsbury's for party foods. Nothing planned at the moment but her OH's work sometimes involves social events and putting them on, so something could come up. There was something else as well, I think, but I can't recall what it was.

Time had got away from us again so we then had to do the usual closing down routine. Just after we closed down the Circle Aureen mentioned my stitching and asked if I'd ever thought of selling my stitched pieces. I replied that it wasn't really a feasible thing to do, as if you priced according to the hours spent on a piece people just weren't willing to pay it, and mentioned eBay and how the pieces on there went for peanuts. She asked if I'd ever been commisioned to do a specific piece - no, but I do tend to stitch items to give as gifts, as well as for my home. She then asked if I ever stitched Angels and I smiled at her and said that, actually, I was currently stitching a small Angel (making rough sizing movements with my hands, to show how big the piece was - my Just Nan Flora) that would be going into my Craft Room, once completed, so she could watch over things in there. Aureen smiled back and said: thought so, I saw you stitching an Angel. :0)

We started heading for the door then, as I knew DH would be waiting outside for me by this time. I said goodbye to the girls and thanked Aureen and she once again reminded me about writing everything down, stressing the importance of this, as I left. I forgot to say that I'd see her on Saturday, as I have a Reiki session then.... but am sure she will remember.  LOL

DH and I drove home, via a quick detour to Tesco Express for a few bits and pieces, discussing a few things from that night as we travelled. Once again I felt quite tired - I think the smaller group means we each have to feed in more energy than usual, to raise the energy for contacting Spirit, so it seems to be more tiring than usual. I went to bed a little earlier, to compensate.

Friday, 19 March 2010


As we missed the first M,B&S event of the year in Grimsby and the next local one (Lincolnshire Showground) isn't until June we decided to head on over to the one being held at Elsecar Heritage Centre. So we were up early, packed lunch made and put into the cool box and the car loaded and journey started. After a niggling start (busy garages making getting diesel a real pain, having to stop to close the bonnet as DH had managed to catch the button when he opened the fuel flap and the satnav detoured us off at Doncaster, just for the hell of it which had DH revising the route) we eventually got there - as it was dinnertime by then we opted to sit in the car and have the packed lunch before going into the venue.

Once we'd eaten and used the facilities we went in. Whilst the Heritage Centre as a whole was a tad busy (it was Mother's Day) the hall itself didn't seem overly crowded, so we were able to get round all the stalls more easily than last time. The first thing I did was to find my regular card reader, Leonie, to book a slot. Someone was just about to sit down at her table, so she booked me in the next slot.... half an hour to kill, so we started wandering round to look at the stalls. First up was the Moonshadow stall which is very Native American based. These were my buys:

The dragonfly on jade piece is beautiful and has a lovely feel to it and the incense will be good to use for Spirit Garden/ Safe Place and Earth oriented meditations. We wandered a little further, looking at several other stalls, then headed for the He Hi She Lo stall, as I wanted a piece of snowflake obsidian to pop into the glovebox of my new car, as it's a good one for protection whilst travelling. Unfortunately he didn't have any but pointed us in the direction of another stall that did but we left that for a little later, as it was then time for ym reading.

DH went for a sit down and cup of tea whilst I had my reading, which was, as always, interesting. At the end she asked if I had any questions. Instant brain blank (as usual) but then I thought of something: I said I didn't want to give too much away initially, but I was doing something at the moment and I wondered if she could tell if I was on the right path. She paused and looked to one side (this I recognise as "talking" with Spirit) then said yes, I definitely was... then asked what it was I was doing. I told her that I'd been going to a Development Circle, to which she instantly warned me not to go paying an arm and a leg for this and I reassured her that I don't. She then said that I didn't really need to go to a Circle as I was a natural at communicating with Spirit and would also be so with healing - that made me really smile, as I hadn't mentioned healing to her. I told her that I was going to attend a healing course in May and she said that that was good..... and also said that in a few years time she could see me sat where she was, doing what she was doing! It certainly gave me a bit of a boost after the poor sessions of Clairvoyance I'd been having recently. LOL I thanked her and rejoined DH, who had finished his drink by now, and headed for the other crystal stall where I found the perfect piece of snowflake obsidian:

A small palmstone sized piece that we both thought would be better than a tumblestone, as it wouldn't rttle around so much in the glovebox. :0)

Next stop was the Magik Thread book stall. No M,B&S event is complete without a good look at the books. :0) I found something of interest once again:

This is jumping up to the top of my To Read list - next one, after I've finished the menopause book and a novel I'm currently reading. I reasoned that, as I'm (trying) to work with Spirit, it's best to gen up on as much information as possible. ;0) There were lots of books that were of interest but remembering all those Hospice Bookshop buys waiting to be read at home made me keep it to one buy. LOL

After wandering a bit further we came across a stall that had Angel bits and pieces on it, called A New Belief. I spotted the Guided Meditation CD's and immediately liked this one:

My Archangel, healing and crystals - definitely one I wanted to try out. I have done since and it was a lovely one to do..... and I'll be listening to it again soon. :0)

We also stopped by another of our favourite stalls: Dragonfly Moon. I'd received their email newsletter earlier in the month and it had the news that Susan's solo CD was now available, so that was a must-buy.

I haven't had the chance to listen to it yet..... but I'll be rectifying that situation shortly. I also asked Susan about a carrying case for my drum and whether it was best to keep it in one all the time, which led to an interesting conversation about various theories on this..... which boiled down to personal preference. Unfortunately they hadn't got any of the right size in stock, though were expecting a delivery soon.... so we said we'd hopefully see her again at the Lincolnshire Showground event.

We stopped off at the Zone of Tranquility for a sit down, to catch our breaths.... and to add a couple of names to the healing curtain. Just five minutes in this little oasis of quiet sets you up for another foray. Soon after we had a stop by the JM Soaps stall, to stock up on a few goodies:

Those bath melts and soap smell divine. The Pine essential oil is for my burner, adding to my little stash of aromatherapy bits. Then we stopped by the Blue Moon Goddess stall. I wanted a sticker for my car that says: Never drive faster than your Angel can fly - they had some but they were bright sparkly ones and I didn't like them, so didn't bother. I spotted these bookmarks instead:

The figure in the one on the left reminds me of myself, walking my Path..... and the saying is to act as a reminder of the truth of that saying whenever I start to get impatient with my slow or lack of progress in Circle. LOL The Celtic Blessing is one I love and it is so beautifully decorated too. I don't intend using them - they are purely decorative reminders. :0) DH made me stay away while he bought some cards - he likes to buy alternative type cards for me (birthday, anniversary etc) as he knows I love the images on them. :0)
Time was marching on by now and most folks had headed for home already, so we went back to a stall we'd had a quick look at earlier: Life's Treasures. This had a selection of cold packs for natural pain relief...... but what first attracted me was the small pack for use to stop snoring. Not for me.... for DH. I decided it was worth a try, as it would be far less damaging than the usual elbow in the ribs...... and would save me from doing time, should I be driven to the final resort: the pillow smothering method. ROFL It was really interesting to talk to the lady and get to handle some of the sample products. Here's what we came away with:

The larger one is for using on neck, shoulder, back, elbows and knees and the smaller is for slotting in the end of DH's pillow. The Biofreeze sachets were freebies for us to try - it's another natural pain relief product and all are safe for diabetics to use, unlike some over-the-counter products. I'll let you know if the stop snoring pack works. LOL
By this time we had about done and the event was winding down for the day. I'd considered having an aura photo taken, to see if there had been any changes due to my attending the Circle, but DH reckoned it would be too soon, so best to leave it until June: I will have been to far more Circle sessions and done many more meditations etc by then, plus had more acupuncture and Reiki, so any changes should be much more noticeable by then. It confirmed some of what I'd been thinking, so we decided to call it a day and head home.

The journey back was uneventful (unlike start of the journey there!) and we were soon home and unloading our bags. We rounded the night off with a take out curry (usually a Saturday night happening but we decided to do it Sunday instead) and an early night, as we were both shattered. It had definitely been a lovely Mother's Day outing. :0)

Monday, 15 March 2010


Back to a Thursday for my regular acupuncture session this week - I am definitely happier with it being on this day, rather than on a Tuesday, as I can take my time.... and it means I get out twice a week. :0)

This week Anne was receptionist and, as Janet was still dealing with a client in Treatment Room 1, she took me into Treatment Room 2 for a natter.... after I handed over a cheque as deposit for the Shamballah Healing Course I'm taking in May. It's always good to chat to her and this time it was really useful, as she gave me her DH's card - he's a joiner who has been in the business for donkey's years.... and it's always useful to know someone in the trade. :0)

Janet came through before we had chance to settle in for a really long chinwag, so Anne went back to reception whilst Janet got my notes, then asked how things had been going. Well, Circle still isn't going well as far as Clairvoyance is going but the meditation side of things does seem to be getting better. I told her about the meditations we'd done: how meeting myself etc had been emotional and that I felt there were still some things to be dealt with there and the very vivid visualisation of my Safe Place. It seems the third eye is beginning to benefit....so I'll happily put up with getting a needle jabbed into it every week. LOL She said that I hadn't been doing so badly with the Clairvoyance and pointed out the "hit" I'd had with her and her grandmother. That was good... but things hadn't gone quite so well since, barely getting much of anything and never really knowing who it's for. She said that that was often the way and that I might find that some messages I get will, invariably, be for myself. I laughed and said that that might be happening already and told her about the young girl and Deirdra. She also thought that it was a message for me and said it would be interesting to see what unfolded. from it.

She asked how my stomach and the anxiety had been. I told her about not having been well, due to some kind of bug kicking off the evening after the session, and having to call off the visit to my DSis's, as I'd spent the best part of two days in bed. She told me that if you have an acupuncture session session early enough when you're coming down with something, it helps to kickstart your immune system into action to fight it. This results in you not feeling very well for a day or two, then being OK....... whereas, if you hadn't have had the acupuncture, you may well end up being ill for one or two weeks. I did seem to get over it a lot quicker than I have done in the past, so feel there's some truth in it. Once I started to feel better my stomach improved and the anxiety soon disappeared. Guess you can call that a goos result. :0)

She then asked how the hot flushes/sweats had been. Reasonable, although I'd had a couple of belters the previous couple of days. I told her about running out of the herbal medicine I'd been taking and going on to take some red clover leaf extract capsules instead, along with a Vitamin C supplement - I was also going to add in a Vitamin E capsule, as that should also help with those. I'm also adjusting my diet slightly, to try and help. I've already done much of what is recommended (cutting out alcohol and caffeine in all forms and generally eating healthier, thanks to the Candida diet I've stayed on) but tweaking the protein (eating less of it) and the carbohydrates (eating a little more) and generally eating more veggies also helps. It's a case of waiting and seeing what affect this has, once my body gets used to it. Janet said she could adapt the treatment to help too.

With this she took my Chinese pulses: they weren't as rapid as they'd been the previous week, which was good, but there was still signs of imbalance there. The upshot was that she would be adapting the treatment to help cool my blood and this should help sort out those tropical moments, these beig extra to the needles that were for the hormonal and Spiritual things. This week I could keep my top on but I would need to roll my sleeves back, so she could get to my elbow area, but I would need to take off my shoes, socks and jeans. The day had been warmer so I wasn't wearing the thermal longjohns this week.... that made things a tad easier. LOL After closing the blinds she left the room while I got myself sorted and settled myself on the treatment bed.

When she came back in she set about inserting the needles: ones in the fleshy areas around my knees, all the ones around my ankles and in the tops of my feet; the heart meridian ones in my wrists; extra ones either sides of the thumb creases in both hands and one in each arm, close to the elbow crook; the final one in my third eye. Again, some of the needles I barely registered whilst others stung quite a bit and I could feel those slight shifts inside my body that tell me the energy is moving.... and I had to consciously make myself relax, as I tensed up a little as it happened. The third eye needle had the usual effect of making me feel slightly whoozy. Once I'd relaxed my muscles Janet adjusted a couple of the needles, after telling me to say when they "bit". Yep, I definitely let her know, as it does give a bit of a belt when she does that. Back to getting my muscles to relax once again and, once this was done, she switched on the CD, adjusting it to a comfortable level, switched off the light and left me to chill out.

Chill out was the operative word..... those blood cooling needles really worked, as I started to feel decidedly chilled some way into the treatment, despite the heater being full on.... and one of the needles in my left hand, close to the thumb crease, really started to bother me. In fact my hand started to ache badly along the palm and up to my little finger, so I had to lay my arm down on the bed, by my side, to give it some ease. I'd not had that happen before and wasn't too sure what to do but, as Janet had gone into the other Treatment Room with another client, I decided to persevere. It was very distracting though, as was feeling so cold, so it was impossible to relax properly and drift with the music as I would have liked to have done. Of course, these days, one of the side effects of feeling chilled is the effect it has on my bladder.... as in, I always desperately need to pee. So it was a definite relief when Janet eventually came back into the room. LOL

She asked how I was so I told her about being chilled, badly needing to pee and the hand hurting. She asked where exactly it was hurting and I showed her and she said that that was exactly where the meridian ran, which was why it hurt there. She did tell me what that needle was treating but I've since forgotten - I do know that as soon as she said it, it explained why it was playing up. She did say that the room did feel a little cold to her, although the heater was on...... but I guess the cooling effect of the needles was most likely the culprit (although I have since wondered if I had also had a "visitor", as it was exactly the same chill effect La and I had felt when a Spirit had been stood behind us both). As I was so desperate for the loo she quickly removed the needles, checked when I wanted to make my next appointment (to let Anne know), said goodbye and left so I could get my gear back on. I didn't hang around - as soon as I'd got my socks, jeans and shoes on I shot out to use the facilities. Boy, was that a relief!

After going back into the room to grab the rest of my stuff I went back out to see Anne.... who was highly amused by all this. I was too, once my bladder was empty! LOL I told her about how chilled I'd been and she said that I should have shouted, as she would have got a blanket to cover me. I said I'd remember that for next time it happened. I booked my next appointment for the following Thursday, got a herbal tea and some Vitamin E capsules and paid my dues, then said my goodbyes and headed for the door.

This week I headed for the Hospice Bookshop again and found these two useful books:

Both will help me gen up in these two areas... and at a £1.00 each they were too good a bargain to miss. :0)
After that I headed for the market.... though I was now feeling quite hungry, so wasn't going to hang around. Unfortunately the craft stall hadn't got any of the boxes left that I wanted, though they did have some peel-off boxes, so I bought one of those, as I knew I could use it for organising other bits for my Craft Room. The stallholder said she would be getting more of the A4 sized ones in shortly, so I said I'd be back again another week. A quick scan round the rest of the market, adding a punnet of strawberries to my haul, then I headed back up the High Street, via the Post Office so I could post a package. I had a quick call in at the Library to ask the Adult Education folks if they still ran Yoga classes, as I feel these would be of benefit to me: apparently not, any more - due to funding restrictions they are now only allowed to offer classes that result in gaining a qualification certificate. How stupid is that? The lasy did suggest that I ask at the Leisure Centre.... but that's in town and I don't go there very often, so I shall have to find the phone number and give them a ring.

Once home I put the shopping away and then made myself some overdue dinner. Once that had been eaten I popped to the nearby Pet and Garden shop to get some wild bird seed, came back and put that in the storage tub, then set about filling the feeders. It seemed very slightly warmer out there than of late, though I didn't hang around for too long. By this time I had begun to feel a bit tired, so I realised it had been another reasonably intensive treatment, so took it easy from then on..... and was relieved not to have to go to Circle afterwards.

Thursday, 11 March 2010


I had quite a nice chill out day, fitting in a meditation session mid-afternoon, and felt a whole lot more positive this week. The think has done some good and various things have reminded me of L's philosophy: that it isn't always about the end result, sometimes it's more about the journey. Time to stop getting hung up about what's not happening, relax and just enjoy the process. :0)

DH almost wrecked the calmness by not leaving work until the last minute, despite needing to eat before taking me to Circle. He will not be rushed and the more you try to chivvy him the slower he gets... deliberately, to my mind. It's made me even more determined to get a car: that way I won't get fraught because he's late or won't be hurried.... I'll be able to take myself off at a time, and pace, that suits me.

Luckily I calmed down again during the journey... and everyone else seemed to be running a little later than usual, as I ended up being the first to arrive! LOL Aureen and I chatted a little as we waited for the others to arrive: she kept a look out at the window for G and popped out when she saw she'd arrived. G knew the general area to come to but wasn't sure which house, as it was her first time, so Aureen wanted to make sure she found us OK. Everyone arrived very soon after this. Not only did we have a new member but A had sorted out her babysitting problems and was able to make it.... and it was lovely to see her again.

When Sh arrived she sat next to me and I said: remember Mary? She did, so I told her she'd had a direct hit and who she was. She was thrilled and, as Aureen pointed out, it goes to show that, as I didn't know who Mary was, it wasn't a case of picking up on something I'd said or even mind-reading - she'd been given it from Spirit. It was a lovely positive note to start the night on. :0)

We went through to the other room. I was sat between G and A this week, thankfully not with my back to the empty kitchen area, although not far off. For some reason I much prefer to have a wall or the closed patio doors behind me.... not that those things make much difference to Spirit! ROFL Aureen clarified with G how far she had got to during the previous Circle she'd attended and make sure she knew all about protecting herself, the Chakras, grounding etc. It seems she's not far off where we've got up to, especially as she is learning Spiritual Healing. We then passed round the Healing Book so names could be written in there and a prayer said.

This week we were to do two different meditations. The first one would be fairly long, the other shorter and they probably wouldn't leave much time for clairvoyance afterwards but she'd see. She told us more about the meditations and then the Circle was opened and protection put in place.

For the first meditation: we had to open our Chakras, then focus on our breathing for a while, breathing in through our nose, then out through our mouths, then focus on our base Chakra; ground ourselves from our soles and our base Chakra; pull energy up to our base Chakra and imagine its energy reaching every part of our bodies; imagine a column of white light entering our bodies through our crown Chakra and merging with the red pulled up and through our base Chakra; then focus on our heart Chakra next and imagine breathing in love through it and allowing it to reach every part of our body; we then had to sit down and visualise that we were sat opposite ourselves, looking at ourself and noticing facial details etc; we were to send the love from our heart chakra to our other self, then tell her the thing we liked most about her; we then had to see if there was a message from our other self for us; next we had to imagine both our selves standing up and hugging each other, allowing the two to become one. There was then a long list of things we were to recognise, such as accepting love without fear and allowing ourselves to feel whole and happy (very positive things but too many for me to remember). We then had to become aware of ourselves in the room and come back.

Aureen asked us all how we felt and we all agreed it had been a very moving experience. It was also a very personal experience for each of us, so only the basic bits we were able to talk about were discussed. I can't say I had been able to see my other self solidly in front of me but I did feel that I had made a connection and it had brought home a few things to me.... and actually highlighted a few other relevant things that had been on my mind recently and need working on. Aureen asked us how we had felt about hugging ourselves and giving/receiving the love and I (and a couple of the others) admitted that it had felt awkward.... and that had brought its own realisations. She realised that this had affected me quite a bit (she said she could feel the emotion coming off me) and I said that I felt this was a meditation I would need to do again at home so that I could really let myself go, should I feel the need.

One of the main reasons for doing this meditation is to make us realise, especially those who wish to do Healing, that we need to be able to love ourselves, warts and all, before we can open to the loving healing energy and love others enough to aid them. In other words, we need to be whole and healed in heart, as well as in body, before we can hope to help others. It makes me think of the old adage: physician, heal thyself. I took the point: much of what I've been doing this last year and a bit has been mostly to heal my body, with some to heal my heart (grief-wise) but I know I still have some other issues that need to be worked on further. Oddly enough, words that came to me during this meditation were: warts and all. :0)

The second meditation was the first one from the three we are to do to meet our Spirit Guides. Yay! This first one from the three is to go to our Safe Place: a meadow where we know we can return whenever we need to feel safe. Aureen wants us to go here and be able to clearly visualise it because she needs to know that we can do this and be 100% confident that we are safe before taking us on the next two steps: first meeting our Power Animals, then on to meet our Guides. I asked if the Safe Place was different to a Sacred Place and if that was different to our Garden. Aureen said the Safe Place and the Garden are different and that she would class the Garden as our Sacred Place (more on this later).

For this meditation Aureen turned out the light and we had to: begin by concentrating on our breathing, breathing in through our mouths, holding it for the count of four, then breathing out through our mouths - I find concentrating a problem, as it usually sends it out of whack and I spend so much time concentrating on trying to get it right that it becomes a distraction... so after a while I left my breathing to sort itself out and just listened to Aureen's voice guiding us; we then had to walk along our country lane, passing by the gate to our garden and going to another gate, noticing what it looked like; we then had to look over/through the gate and see the meadow beyond, then open the gate and go in, closing the gate behind us; once inside we had to notice the extent of the meadow and what it was edged by (fence, wall, hedge, trees - whatever) and know that nothing could get in there, we were totally alone; we then had to notice what we were or weren't wearing, then look out across the meadow and see what was there and what the whole looked like; next we had to walk to the centre of the meadow and lay down and enjoy the sights, smells and sounds; when we had been there for a while we then had to walk back to the gate, exit and walk back down the lane and come back to ourselves.
Aureen then got us to open for clairvoyance, concentrating on just one person and seeing if we could get a clear message for them. She then put the light back on and went round each of us in turn to see how the meditation had gone and who our message was for.

Here's what I can remember:
Sh: wrought iron gate (I saw this before I saw my own gate!), dry stone wall on three sides and a thicket of trees at the bottom, she wasn't aware of anything beyond it. Hers was a poppy filled meadow and lush green grass.

S2: meadow from her childhood, with cows - one she'd disappeared into when she was three years old (sparking a full-on police search!) and loved - with clouds of gypsophila type white flowers and bluebells. She felt that, although she couldn't see him, her Guide was hovering in the background waiting to meet her but she told him not yet, we're not supposed to yet. Aureen said that was good, as S2 needed to learn to focus, rather than going wandering off on different paths (this has happened during sessions), and it looked like she was doing alright with it. Her message was for Aureen: she mentioned two names (both owned) and described the person both names belonged to. She had also seen the same man she's seen before, and described, who Aureen still can't place. She wondered, as this man gives the impression that he's looking after Aureen and keeping her safe, if he's another Guide she hasn't met yet, or some other Guardian. She received a message from one of the other girls (not sure who) and some of it involved hearing the song "What's it all about, Alfie?" - she took that, as she says whenever psychic things happen she always asks what that's all about?

G: she had seen everything clearly and also enjoyed it - unfortunately I can't remember more. Her message was for Aureen.

When it was my turn I said: I love this meditation - I can DO this one! which made everyone laugh. Up to now visualising my silver birch tree has been the clearest, most vivid mental image I've ever received.... this was even clearer! I saw a large wooden five-bar gate, complete with one of those long metal "arm" type fastenings with a ball on top and I felt like I'd opened the gate, walked in and closed it behind me. My meadow was surrounded by a thick green hawthorn hedge (hawthorn for protection) and there were little critters rustling around in there - it wasn't regimented (as in four sides like a garden) but irregularly shaped. The meadow itself was draped across a slight hillock, and had buttercups, poppies, something like cornflowers (small and blue) and some white flowers (daisies, possibly) and knee length grass, with a few bees around. It was a warm summers day and I was butt naked. That made the girls comment LOL. As I pointed out, I don't usually do naked and can be quite prudish on occasion (eg: despite knowing I was having the op to have my ovaries out I still asked if I could wear some pants! LOL) - I feel the nakedness was to reinforce the knowledge that I felt totally safe and protected in there. Remember when you were a child and you were so full of the joy of living that you would run up a hill, then spin round in circles with your arms raised and drop to the ground? Well that's how I felt and it's what I felt I did - it was amazing! I reluctantly walked back to the gate and felt like I'd put on a blue flowing dress (very similar to one I love to wear in summer) before I left. I said I'd definitely be doing this one again. :0) The clairvoyance hadn't gone well again as I'd initially darted about and struggled to settle on one person - then I got the name Deidra again and felt I'd seen a mirror (oe picture) with a metal or metal-look trim around that had flowers on it - more focus on the frame, though I couldn't say who it was for or what it was about. Aureen said not to worry, as I'd done really well with the meditations. As I said: I'm not going to let this stress me anymore as it adds to the block, I shall concentrate on enjoying the journey. :0)

A: she had struggled with this. She saw the gate (can't remember) but her meadow had been black - can't remember if it was surrounded by barbed wire, or if that was A's or S1's. She flooded it with white light before going in, realising it wasn't normal, and to ensure it was safe, but it stayed the same so she went in anyway, feeling that it was alright. She felt OK and knew she was safe and felt happy enough there, and could see all the details that were there, except for it all being black. As she was going back to her gate she felt a hand on her shoulder, which was non-threatening, and felt it was her Guide, and a voice said: Too Soon. Normally she'd question why etc but she accepted this. Aureen felt that her having missed four weeks was partly the problem, so she asked her to practice this meditation at home through this week, as she needed to be ready to do this for the next stages. Although she did say that we weren't to worry about any of it: we all knew how to go to our Safe Place and knew that we were safe there...... some of us would meet our Guides but it may well be that some may not, despite everything. It couldn't be predicted.

S1: I think hers was a five-bar gate too. Her meadow was full of golden corn, bluebells and poppies and also had cows in there. Aureen made a joke about her borrowing the cows from S2's field - they were sat opposite one another, so there could have been some transference. The difference was that S1 could hear sheep and lambs bleating on the other side of her fence. Her message was for S2.

The time had gone really quickly this week so we had to quickly close down, protect ourselves and close the Circle. Aureen is always conscious that my DH will be waiting outside...... hopefully that won't be a problem for too much longer though. LOL

I said goodbye to the girls and as we were heading for the front door Aureen mentioned something about the Sacred Place/Garden (I guess she realised there was more to my question) so I explained. A couple of weeks ago I was doing a meditation and set off doing one thing (walking through the woods to go to the cleansing waterfall) when I suddenly arrived somewhere else: there were trees all around (not the giant Redwoods I see on the way to the waterfall but a typical British woodland) and in the middle of the trees was a clearing; the clearing was circular and around the edges of it, in front of the surrounding trees, were standing stones - not huge ones, ones about waist height and not quite as wide as a person - and in the middle of the clearing was a fire which was also surrounded by small rocks. I saw this more as still photo images, though there had been movement in the fire. It was all very Pagan and I also felt safe there... I don't remember much else as I got disturbed before it got any further - but I was left with the feeling that something more should/would have happened. Aureen said that this obviously was my Sacred Place, separate to my Garden. There wasn't time for more, as the other girls were lining up behind me ready to leave, so we said goodbye and I left.

DH was waiting patiently, reading his newspaper. He could tell straightaway that I was feeling much brighter and more positive this time around and asked how it went, so I told him a little about the meditations. There was a slight detour via Tesco Express for some shopping on the way home which is always good for bringing me back down to Earth with a bump LOL.

I have since done the meditations at home. The safe place wasn't quite as vivid but I could still see it. :0)
When I tried to redo the "Meet Yourself" one I struggled to remember some of it..... but I had the name Deidra come to me again...... and I went quite deeply at one point and saw a young (pre-pubescent) girl walking towards me: I couldn't see her face very clearly but she had shoulder length fair hair (much fairer than mine has ever been) and she had on what seemed to be a jumper with large blocks or stripes of colour on it. As soon as I became more aware of what was happening the image of her had gone.... before I could try again DH rang and the moment was well and truly shattered. I was chatting to my DSis later in the day and mentioned all of this to her and idly wondered if maybe it was my Angel's name, so she suggested doing an internet search to find out the meaning of the name, as no one was claiming her. Doh! Why didn't I think of that?
One Google later and Deidra is a derivation of Deidre, thought to be of Celtic origin...... and thought to mean "young girl". So one week I see a young girl during a Reiki session, shortly after one was seen by S2 cuddling up to S1's painful leg, I've since had the name Deidra some to me twice during Circle and now at home and I've seen a young girl again during this most recent meditation. Cue the Twilight Zone music. LOL I have no idea what it's about.... yet. Watch this space, as hopefully more will be revealed to me before too much longer.