Saturday 20 March 2010

DEVELOPMENT CIRCLE - 16TH MARCH

Everything went well this week: a calm, chill-out day; meal cooked and eaten early enough; DH back early enough to eat and be ready on time and setting off with plenty of time to take a nice, steady journey. :0)

I was the first to arrive. Aureen apologised for the coldness of the house, as she'd been a little later than usual setting off, so the heating hadn't been turned up long - she decided to leave the thermostat up a little higher in future, to try and ensure the house doesn't get quite so freezing in future. I said it was OK... I had my thermals on anyway. LOL

As we waited for the others to arrive we chatted and I told her about thinking that Deidra and the young girl that keeps cropping up (even Leonie, my reader, says every time that there's a young girl with me) is for me and explained what had happened since the previous week. We didn't have time to discuss it further as S1 and Sh arrived. When they had sat down she told us that S2 and G couldn't make it this week, as S2 had been at the hospital with a sick relative all night and didn't feel up to coming and poor G was down with a chest infection and had lost her voice. It meant we wouldn't be able to do the Power Animal meditation - disappointing but these things happen.... and there's usually a reason why (such as it not being the right time for one or more of us to do this just yet). We waited a little longer but A didn't turn up either, so we guessed she must have babysitter problems again, as she hadn't texted Aureen to say she wouldn't be coming.

We went through into the other room, taking a chair out of the Circle. Once settled Aureen started to talk to us about Spirit Guides: that we usually have one main Guide, who is with us throughout our lifetime.... and sometimes stays with us through several lifetimes. This Guide may even have been incarnated with us on Earth during a previous lifetime but was more Spiritually developed, so had progressed, but had chosen to come back to help us to progress. Then there were also temporary Guides, who would come to help us over a shorter time and usually for a specific reason or to help us with a particular life lesson. She then told Sh and S1 what I'd said about the young girl and the name Deidra.... and said that she felt Deidra was probably another of my Guides, of the temporary variety, and that perhaps more would be revealed as we eventually undertook the meditation to meet our Spirit Guide...... or it may not become clear yet, as more development would need to be done. Basically, only time will tell.

Aureen then asked us all if we felt that we were learning and developing, which we did, then asked how we felt we were developing/what we were getting out of the Circle. Of course she went and asked me first. Gulp! I said that it was a hard question, as some of it was difficult to put into words, as I felt the differences within. It has helped to open my mind to far more than I expected. I always felt as if I'd missed my way somewhere along the line, not quite fitting in, not knowing what I was supposed to do - just going along with whatever happened (kind of a reactive way rather than proactive, iykwim).... then things happened that led me to this Circle. I likened it to the first time I went to a Mind, Body and Spirit event: when I walked into the hall it was like going home; the atmosphere was lovely - it felt right. And that's how I feel about Circle: it feels right. It's brought focus into my life and I feel that I finally know what I should be doing. (It's also how I felt when I finally realised my true Pagan self - though refrained from saying this). I'm also learning - or trying to learn - some of that much needed patience!
I've thought since then: it's almost as if part of me has been waiting. I've been putting in time, learning various lessons through the years, living and enjoying my life along with my loved ones, growing some....... but still, essentially, waiting. Until now. :0)

Sh and S1 both said that this (Spiritual side) was something they had tended to dip into and out of at various points in their lives.... but that something always seemed to occur that always drew them back to it. Sh told the story of how suddenly becoming aware of a card in a shop window advertising card readings resulated in her booking one, continually forgetting to ask who the reader was, turning up for the session.... to be amazed by meeting up with Aureen again, and that led her to this Circle. S1 had been feeling isolated, somewhat bereft, since her move here... then had decided to go to the Clinic for some herbal medicine to help her stomach problems...... and her talks with Jan had led to an introduction to Aureen and a meeting with me at the Holistic fair... and to the Circle. The Universe seems to have really taken a hand in all of this. :0)

We passed the Healing Book round so we could add names and sent prayers and healing to all named within it. Aureen then said that, as we couldn't do the meditation, we would take the opportunity to do some one-to-one Clairvoyance again as it would be good practice for us. I couldn't help it - my heart dropped into my boots. Cr*p! Despite all my positive thinking and wanting to take things as they came I still reacted negatively..... and that just isn't the way to start one of these sessions. How to block yourself in one easy lesson! LOL So the Circle was opened, protection put in place, grounding done and Chakras opened.

First of all we all concentrated on Aureen. I got a clicking in my right ear initially, then the words Fairy Arch and saw an arch of flowers (very pretty) but no idea as to what it meant. Got the name George again and also saw a pond with lily pads in it. There was also a bunch of flowers. All very random. George keeps coming up for Aureen but I wasn't sure if he came up again because we'd been talking about him earlier. Aureen's left ear had been bothering her.... and as she was sat opposite me it was opposite my right ear. Other than that she couldn't place the other things.

Next we concentrated on Sh. I got Fuschia Man again and had a clicking noise in my left ear and felt a tickling on the left side of my neck (the side Sh was sat) and wanted to laugh. I also felt a quick pain in my left brow. Then I saw what initially looked like a sandcastle but turned into a proper castle - I described it as a well known and much photographed one, standing on a mountainside and surrounded by mountains and somewhere like Bavaria or Germany or the like, as I couldn't then remember more than that it began with an N. (I've since discovered it's called Neucshwanstein Castle and is in Bavaria, as I initially thought).
S1 saw Sh getting dressed up in a proper ballgown and going to a party.... she'd also seen Edinburgh Castle and something or other Mile in Edinburgh.
Aureen mentioned a name and described several things she'd seen and Sh owned them all - unfortunately I can't for the life of me remember what they were now, as the menopausal brain syndrome is really bad at the moment.

Then it was my turn. Sh saw an old man pushing an old handcart down a dirt track and said it looked like a farming type area and felt he was from way back. She got the name Ben/Benjamin and she saw him sat at a kitchen table, eating a solitary meal - she said it was all rather sad and lonely. I couldn't place him but said I'd ask the Uncles if they could - though I do know that there are some sort of farming links on both sides of the family a couple of generations back. She also saw me sipping a glass of sherry or port at some kind of celebration, like an anniversary, though she felt it was someone else's, not mine. She got the name Anita linked with this but the name doesn't bring anyone to mind at the moment.... I wondered if it might be someone to do with the LTC but, again, I don't recall DH or DS having mentioned anyone with that name. Guess I'll have to wait and see. She also said she had got the name Bert too. The only Bert I could think of were neighbours of my Nana and Grandad (Mum's Mum), who used to live across the road, in the corner house, though I didn't know much about them as I was a child at the time.
Aureen said her Guides had told her to tell me to make sure I write everything down, whether it be from within Circle, my dreams or meditations or when I have acupuncture or Reiki. As I seemed to be getting more outside of Circle than in it at the moment I had to especially write those things down. She was told that in the future I would need to be able to go back and check specific details, as it would be important for me. I had already started to do this on a small scale... when I remembered to do so, so Aureen stressed again that I needed to write it all down and make sure that it was all dated too. (I've since started doing this).
She then asked who had had a very spoilt and pampered Yorkshire Terrier. I knew my Nana and Grandad had had a dog when my Mum was a child but thought that had been a Scottie dog/West Highland Terrier (nasty little bugger it was too, from all accounts, prone to biting), then recalled visiting a particular relatives house (Mum's Aunt and Uncle, so my Great's) when I was a small child. They bred dogs and I recall being taken out into some little wooden sheds in their back garden to see some newborn puppies that were under a heat lamp - tiny little things they were, and I wondered if the Yorkie was linked with those. Since then I've chatted to my DSis and it turns out that my Nan and Grandad actually owned an extremely spoilt Yorkie called Mitzi - I'd forgotten all about that! So I'll have to try and remember to tell Aureen at the next Circle.
S1 said she initially saw me in a maze (I smiled because it made me think of walking the labyrinth) but she said I seemed quite panicky, and said it made her think of my agoraphobia and panic attacks, but she said I then stopped panicking and became very calm. Then she heard a voice say: it's OK, Jack will help. I smiled and told them that my Grandad (Dad's Dad) was called Jack - his proper name was John James but everyone called him Jack. I feel this is symbolic: me, currently floundering around and not knowing the way out - though I don't know where my Grandad in Spirit will come in to this - we weren't particularly close in life..... though he was psychic and it did save his life when he was a young man. I'm sure there was something else she got too but I can't remember what it was.

Then we concentrated on S1. First I saw Sydney Opera House, then this was followed by images of an ostrich, a giraffe and a gazelle or antelope - it made me want to ask if she was thinking of or going on safari. Finally I saw a ballet dancer. She has been to Australia and has seen the Opera House and her OH's company has a branch out there and he travels there regularly.... and she would like to go again, so there's a chance of seeing the Opera House again. They have friends living in South Africa and have an open invitation to go and stay.... no plans to, but who knows what the future might hold? She has also been to the ballet and would like to go again some time. I really wasn't sure how much of this I was picking up from Spirit or how much was coming to me from things that had been mentioned previously. I also felt that there was someone stood near her but forgot to mention that at the time.
Aureen had seen a man in a First World War uniform stood near her (so wish I'd remembered and said it!) and I think she said she got the name Stanley linked with him (weird because my Grandad - Mum's Dad - was called that). I can't remember what else came up.
Sh had the name Joan (weird again - same name as my Mum's DSis). The party theme continued, as Sh had seen her attending a party, though more like a party that S1 would be hosting, and that she would enjoy it. She'd also seen her shopping in Sainsbury's for party foods. Nothing planned at the moment but her OH's work sometimes involves social events and putting them on, so something could come up. There was something else as well, I think, but I can't recall what it was.

Time had got away from us again so we then had to do the usual closing down routine. Just after we closed down the Circle Aureen mentioned my stitching and asked if I'd ever thought of selling my stitched pieces. I replied that it wasn't really a feasible thing to do, as if you priced according to the hours spent on a piece people just weren't willing to pay it, and mentioned eBay and how the pieces on there went for peanuts. She asked if I'd ever been commisioned to do a specific piece - no, but I do tend to stitch items to give as gifts, as well as for my home. She then asked if I ever stitched Angels and I smiled at her and said that, actually, I was currently stitching a small Angel (making rough sizing movements with my hands, to show how big the piece was - my Just Nan Flora) that would be going into my Craft Room, once completed, so she could watch over things in there. Aureen smiled back and said: thought so, I saw you stitching an Angel. :0)

We started heading for the door then, as I knew DH would be waiting outside for me by this time. I said goodbye to the girls and thanked Aureen and she once again reminded me about writing everything down, stressing the importance of this, as I left. I forgot to say that I'd see her on Saturday, as I have a Reiki session then.... but am sure she will remember.  LOL

DH and I drove home, via a quick detour to Tesco Express for a few bits and pieces, discussing a few things from that night as we travelled. Once again I felt quite tired - I think the smaller group means we each have to feed in more energy than usual, to raise the energy for contacting Spirit, so it seems to be more tiring than usual. I went to bed a little earlier, to compensate.

1 comment:

Julie said...

A good week for you