Wednesday, 5 May 2010


This week had been a bit of an up and down one: G's news about her DH on Tuesday night seemed to have triggered quite a few things for me.... added to which was the fact that this month would see my Dad's birthday on the 27th and the anniversary of his passing on the following day. Odd, how you can go along feeling fine and thinking that everything has been dealt with... only to be knocked flat on your ass by something that's happening to someone else.

When I got to the Clinic G was on reception, so I asked her how she was feeling now and her reply was better. We didn't have long to chat though, as Janet was ready for me to go through to the treatment room.

She asked me how things had been going, though I could tell by the beady look she gave me that she had spotted something wrong with my Qi and it was a leading question. LOL I told her about G telling us her news and how it had upset me. It wasn't just for the fact that it had triggered off memories of Dad and what he'd gone through.... having been through the awful time with Dad I knew just what was in store for G and she's such a lovely person that the thought of her going through it was upsetting too. I cried some as I told Janet about it all, then said: But I'd been doing so well.

Janet then said that grief didn't have a set pattern and that it was actually still not all that long a time since I lost my parents, especially my Dad, so it was understandable that G's news would act as a trigger. She also reminded me of the boxes analogy: some issues have obviously been boxed up, rather than dealt with, whilst others have left a residue in my Qi that needs to be moved on and released. She said she would do a treatment that would help this to happen, along with the usual hormonal balancing one.

With that she left the room whilst I took my shoes, socks, cardigan and top off and got laid on the treatment bed. When she came back in I apologised and told her that, in the upset, I'd forgotten to mention that my left knee had been feeling a tad arthritic on and off all week too, sometimes making me limp, so she said she would do something for that too. So this time I had needles in: the left and right sides of my left kneecap (fleshy area); the regular ones around both ankles; in the liver meridians in the top of each foot (ouch! they gave me a big jump this time - a sure sign of the upset); the one in my third eye; one in my right ear; a couple in each hand and extra ones in my upper chest area, between my boobs and a little higher. Some of them made me feel a little woozy when they went in..... another sign that they were moving the energies. After covering me with the turkey roasting blankets, putting the relaxation music on and turning out the light she told me that I was in a totally safe environment and that it was OK to let everything go. I thanked her and she went out.

Well something definitely moved around because as soon as the woozy sensation eased I started to blub again... though it was a gentle release. Unfortunately I couldn't get a tissue out of my pocket because of the needles in my hands. I was glad when Janet popped back in a few minutes later, to see how I was - she gave me a tissue, asked if I was OK and when I said I would be, she left me to go through the rest of the treatment.

Once I'd mopped myself up I started to feel better, began to feel calmer and relaxed and began to drift quite nicely. When Janet came back into the room at the end of the session I almost jumped... as I told her, another five minutes and I'd have been asleep! She seemed quite pleased with that and the fact that I was obviously much calmer. After removing the needles I thanked her and told her that I was feeling much better. She left me to get dressed, reminding me to drink some water before coming out of the treatment room.

After getting up, getting dressed and drinking some water I realised that the ache in my knee had gone and the joint was moving more freely. Another great result! When I was ready I went out to reception to make my next appointment and pay. Once the other client had been taken through to the other treatment room there was a chance to chat with G. She said she felt she was dealing better with the news now, though had felt a little angry after the upset: I said that it was perfectly natural to feel that way, as you go from thinking that there's hope (whilst treatment after the initial diagnosis is ongoing) to having it snatched away when hearing the terminal verdict and that it seems to trigger a kind of grieving process. We chatted for a little longer, then another client came in, so we said our goodbyes until the following Tuesday.

I left pleased that, despite the intial upset before my treatment, that I had been calm enough to be able to talk to G and let her offload a little.... and hoped that some of what we'd talked about had helped her. I know that having someone to talk to who had been there would have helped me through when Dad was having treatment and, ultimately, dying (and probably have helped with the aftermath too) but that opportunity hadn't been there - his MacMillan nurse hadn't been there for him, let alone his family, and there was no one else I knew locally. Knowing you're not alone is so important in these situations.

Afterwards I had a quick look in the Hospice bookshop but I didn't find anything. I decided against going to the market or the shops, in the circumstances, and headed home for a herbal tea and a much-needed chill out.

1 comment:

Julie said...

I am sure your chat with G helped her more that you can imagine